you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize