he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
