Whod you bang
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
