Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
you have to choose: penises or morals?
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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