Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Randomize
