Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
As shirtless as possible
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
