no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
