I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
pop tarts are not kleenex
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize