I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
