hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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