Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
