Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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