This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
