Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
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