I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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