Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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