they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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