I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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