wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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