community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
