Your dad touched me again.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
