I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Randomize
