She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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