he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
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