GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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