he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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