problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
