His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
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