i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
