I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
