I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
