I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Randomize
