yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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