Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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