i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
