At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Randomize