Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
