I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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