There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
