Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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