Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
