at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
