his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
