Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
