we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize