So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
