I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
