i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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