I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
