She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
