how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
We don't watch enough power rangers
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
