Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I could fuck to npr.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
