I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize
